The Inner Struggle

Humility & Humiliation …

An old ditty goes something like this: “Love & Marriage go together like a horse and carriage”. This is redolent of a ancient age when “Love” was caring and sacrificial, willing the good of the loved one.

Our current usage of “love” mostly implies some sort of justification for fornication and the exploitation of sex objects for self gratification. We accessorize members of the attractive “sex”, whatever their biological alignment, or genetic configuration based on how good they look  with us or “how they make me feel”.

Or we pick a paramour based on the current “Flavour Du Jour” in our social circle, our Facebook group, or as a form of virtue signalling according to whichever politically correct legislation just emerged from the dung heap called “Parliament”,

And we embrace whatever drum the media are currently beating … we need to “fit in”, right? And if our accessory no longer “fits in” then it’s time to trade “it” in for something fresher.

And, Humility and Humiliation go together as well, for how is one to learn true humility without humiliation? Many souls desire to be humble, but few desire humiliation. Many souls pray to be made humble “place in me a humble and contrite heart” … but very few want to be humiliated.

Humility is truth. So, we should admit to ourselves that we possess nothing of ourselves except sin,  and so it is just and righteous that we receive humiliation and scorn. If we believed this truth we would accept it as truly just that all would humiliate us and treat us without consideration and despise us.

What honor and consideration does one deserve who has offended his Creator? Even a single venial sin is more deplorable and worthy of more contempt than the most miserable earthly condition, the poorest and lowest station in life.

And so we travel along through life on our merry way, loving ourselves infinitely,  believing sincerely that we are practically perfect in every way, that we are good, that we deserve to be treated well, even better than most others.

The result of such insulation from reality is that in our cosmic self love we interpret every correction, contradiction, every humiliation and comment detracting from our self perceived perfection as a personal attack deserving of the most fervent counterattack, the source of our discomfort must be put down, terminated, hopefully never to rise to sully our self regard again.

And in that self-referential state of faith in our own perfection we destroy totally any and every possibility of growth. We are already perfect. We choose to bask in our own perfection and reject God’s gentle reproof coming to us in the guise of other’s unhappiness with our actions.

We choose to go down the perfect wide path to eternal damnation because we cannot accept correction in any form. And lest, in our self absorption we forget, we need to understand that morality goes beyond the bedroom, to embrace every moment of our social and public lives. Lest we forget … Lest we forget.

There is no possibility of improvement in a soul that rejects all correction and humiliation. But God brings good out of even this evil.

The place where these “perfect” souls interact with others, the interface of personal relations, provide the perfect opportunity for others, more aware of and sensitive to God’s call, to accept humiliation and to practice genuine humility.

It is a true treasure to be offered the opportunity to practice genuine charity and humility, all the  while compensating in the normal train of events for the casual incompetence and even  malice of others, to practice keeping others safe and comfortable in spite of their own ignorance, incompetence, ingratitude, and slovenly self worship.

And to do all this in spite of receiving scorn and denigration and belittlement for rendering this selfless service in such a routine way that it is taken totally for granted by the recipients, their natural due flowing from their exalted state of perfection,.

Presumably, after enough practice, one can even reach a state of charitable love of the other and not resent the recurring instances of chaos needing to be forever and again repaired, fixed up, cleaned up, provided for, anticipated and planned for future rescue efforts.

To charitably accept the utter obliviousness of the perpetrators of the mess and chaos when their utter lack of caring about anything except their self image spreads the chaos far and wide like some apocalyptic tsunami of trouble.

And mostly even malice is absent in this unaware ignorance. Lacking culpability in the obliviousness of daily life, can one even really identify this as sinful?

This “trouble” ranges from all the trivial rotting garbage of uncaring slights and messes left behind for others to deal with at the lowest levels of the ladder of perfection, to the rampant murder of innocents and corruption of the masses for the utility of the elite which we witness every day at the highest levels of this evil of self worship, this pride in self.

If one is unaware of the consequences and misery resulting from one’s actions, if one sincerely “doesn’t mean it”, then is remorse, penitence and correction even possible? If we are “sinless” through lack of culpability then are the narcissists actually right in their belief?

Endless opportunities for humiliation and the practice of humility, true humility. “Bear your humiliation patiently, for man is tried in this crucible as gold in the fire” (Sir 2, 4-5)



Eeyore has a poor opinion of most of the other animals in the Forest, describing them as having “No brain at all, some of them”, “only grey fluff that’s blown into their heads by mistake” (from chapter 1 of The House at Pooh Corner).

Eeyore’s favorite food is thistles. He lives in the southeast corner of the Hundred Acre Wood, in an area labeled “Eeyore’s Gloomy Place: Rather Boggy and Sad” on the map in the book.

He has a stick house therein called The House at Pooh Corner. Pooh and Piglet built it for him after accidentally mistaking the original house that Eeyore built for a pile of sticks.


Pen as Sword - Social Commentary, Uncategorized

Transience and Immutability … “plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose”

“Aki” Rodrigo Rodriguez, from the album “Inner Thoughts”. (2006)

Thinking tonight about the similarities between events in my own family life and what I observe happening in the world around us. Close held opinions, world views which in some ways reject aspects of material reality which do not fit personal narratives, personal images, personal dreams, personal excuses. Some things seem never to change even in a society where change is the single constant.

I and my lovely wife were once great fans of genealogy,  spending many happy hours tracking down all the little facts and details of lives gone by, facts about how our families really lived, what they believed, what they stood for, what they fought for, what they died for.

Using parish documents, census documents, ships passenger lists, church roles for communities in the old and new world, reconstructing the lives of those who went before, weaving a narrative which goes back long before we were born and weaves us into a fabric spanning space and time, a fabric of belonging.

As in the time of my great grand-father, my grand-father and my father, so too now anything worth doing is hard to do. Anything worth making is hard to make. Anything worth expressing is hard to express. Especially, anything worth thinking is hard to think. So too with finding family information and facts when the prevalent meme is “spare me your facts, … “.

People simply don’t want to hear anything that diverges from their fashionable, comfortable and accepted narrative, even within families where digging up the past is at best greeted with “That’s nice dear…” or at worst, hostility and recrimination about “Why do you want to be digging all that up?”, or “That’s just a lie! …”.


Merchant ships of the type sailed along the New Brunswick coast and area in the period Claude was a skipper. (Late 1600’s)

One family myth was that my mother’s side were DeVans from Belgium, and Pitts from Boston. The documented findings (facts?) show otherwise including  a direct lineage from:

PETITPAS, CLAUDE, schooner captain, interpreter, known particularly for his collaboration with the English. (What? a French traitor, certainly a wanted man in some circles. Ha! I’d guess he didn’t share that narrative).

Claude was the third child of a family of 15, son of Claude Petitpas, Sieur de Lafleur, clerk of the court at Port-Royal (Annapolis Royal, N.S.), and of Catherine Bugaret; b. c. 1663 at Port-Royal, d. some time between 1731 and 1733.

During his youth Petitpas was closely associated in his voyages and activities with the Micmacs in the neighbourhood of Port-Royal, where he lived in his father’s home until his marriage. Around 1686 he married an Indian girl of that tribe named Marie-Thérèse, born in 1668, by whom he had at least seven children (Metis), according to the 1708 census. (Hey Mom, bet you didn’t know we have Micmac relatives.)

On 7 Jan. 1721, after his first wife’s death, he remarried, again at Port-Royal; his second wife was Françoise Lavergne from that town, daughter of Pierre Lavergne, Father Breslay’s servant, and of Anne Bernon. She was only 17; he was about 57. (Cradle robber anyone? Whatever, but definitely French no matter how you slice it.)

She bore him four children.Absolutely shocking! Not a Pitts from Boston … hmmm.  Another myth – DeVan – well actually Devanney, from Sligo, Ireland.  OMG people!  Not Belgian and Anglo American but a shady hated background of lowlife Frenchies and drunken Irish!  Not THOSE people. We don’t talk to Those people. Well, Mum refused to ever talk about it and stuck to her myth, her “narrative” until the day she died.

As in the family so too in the greater world at large. That is just the way things always were, are now, and will continue to be, world without end, Amen.

Our society, our culture, our “civilization” worships the glib, the silly, the foolish, the stupid, the inane, the idiotic, the vacuous, the asinine, the comfortable, and especially the fashionable and/or prestigious, in short, anything which will fit in a twitter post – if it is more of an Opus then you will have to switch to Facebook.

In this dark time, everybody finds themselves burdened under burgeoning behaviour codes on every front, academic, legal, social, political, and family, the Star Chamber of the Politically Correct (known as “human rights tribunals” in Canada), the lawless Dictatorship of Relativism, the Family Cabal, shunning the one who dares to dig up “facts”, or worse yet, Speak Them Aloud! But now THOSE people grab the whip hand and wreak vengeance on anyone who mentions them or disagrees with their point of view.

The sentence of “Pariah” is passed and we are only a short hiccup away from being prosecuted because what we brought up might, potentially, hurt the feelings of unknown members of some vaguely defined, politically or familially favored group.

The dissident pariah loses his familial ties, his relationships, his livelihood, or perhaps, if he hopes to keep them, must submit to public humiliation, apologies all around, and some tightly directed PC course of “counseling,” or “sensitivity training,” or “re-education” on what(ever) constitutes acceptable behaviour and he bloody well better accept this chastisement with good grace and humility or he’s a racist homophobic National Socialist, eh?



Dan Jurac Fine Art Photo of Hoar Frost_DSC2972_-25 degrees Celsius by December 5th. It’s about time, eh?  It is winter after all.


The Inner Struggle

History Repeated …

An interesting post from David Warren this morning. the following is quoted from about half way through the post. Go read the whole thing.

It is because Jesus has attracted so many, that trouble is coming His way. He is beginning to disturb the order of old Roman Palestine. This, to those who made themselves responsible for its order, was not “good news.” If, as the politically correct of that day must have said (shrugging knowingly to each other; rolling their eyeballs as they do) — if He’d just kept His doctrine to Himself, none of this would have to happen.

Or even if He had disciples, that would have been okay: so long as they practised their religion in the privacy of their own homes.

“It’s a free country,” after all. Everyone has the right to his opinions, so long as he keeps them to himself; so long as, when they are in public, they bow before the public gods (Caesar, say; or, Same Sex Equality). If only Jesus had been discreet, if only He could have watched His language, it wouldn’t have had to end like this. Instead, He just had to preach. And perform miracles: that was utterly over the top.

But it was worse than that, from the point of view of Palestine’s progressive elites. People were listening to Jesus. Something would have to be done.


This Sunday is called “Laetare Sunday” in the Extraordinary Form of the Roman Rite since its mood and theme is one of hope and rejoicing that Easter is near. The full introit reads

“Laetare Jerusalem: et conventum facite omnes qui diligitis eam: gaudete cum laetitia, qui in tristitia fuistis: ut exsultetis,et satiemini ab uberibus consolationis vestrae. Psalm: Laetatus sum in his quae dicta sunt mihi: in domum Domini ibimus.”
“Rejoice, O Jerusalem: and come together all you that love her: rejoice with joy, you that have been in sorrow: that you may exult, and be filled from the breasts of your consolation. Psalm: I rejoiced when they said to me: “we shall go into God’s House!”

I find the readings today especially relevant to our current society. Even many of the same players are still in action in this modern day. Watch the Telli,  listen to the news, see what we enjoy, look into the darkness all around. Look about you who have eyes to see. Listen, you who have ears to hear.  Truly, truly, can we not see history repeating …

In those days, all the princes of Judah, the priests, and the people added infidelity to infidelity, practicing all the abominations of the nations and polluting the LORD’s temple which he had consecrated in Jerusalem.  Early and often did the LORD, the God of their fathers, send his messengers to them, for he had compassion on his people and his dwelling place.  But they mocked the messengers of God, despised his warnings, and scoffed at his prophets,  until the anger of the LORD against his people was so inflamed that there was no remedy. Their enemies burnt the house of God, tore down the walls of Jerusalem, set all its palaces afire, and destroyed all its precious objects. Those who escaped the sword were carried captive to Babylon,  where they became servants of the king of the Chaldeans and his sons until the kingdom of the Persians came to power.” (Chronicles, Chapter 36)


“… And this is the verdict, that the light came into the world, but people preferred darkness to light, because their works were evil. For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come toward the light, so that his works might not be exposed. But whoever lives the truth comes to the light, so that his works may be clearly seen as done in God. …”  (John, Chapter 3, vs 19-21)








Disclaimer for nitpickers: We take pride in being incomplete, incorrect, inconsistent, and unfair. We do all of them deliberately